Flashback Friday: Dirty Hipsters

Still only one run this week, but the weekend is here and today is a half day. There will be running.

Back Talk
Wherein we cast labels on people

Xenia thinks she finally has me pegged after my confession: "I think we've been wrong all these years. You're not a hippie, you're a hipster. So, how many Apple products do you own?"

Answer: Don't you know I'm too old to be a hipster?

Sure, I'll admit to sharing some similar sensibilities as those skinny jeans wearing, white belt clad, PBR drinking, ironic trucker hat adorned youngsters, but I grew up in the 1980s and '90s, where today's hipsters were called "alternative."

I'm what happens when those people grow up, get a job, stop drinking terrible beer and start wearing more comfortable jeans.

I jokingly referred to this as being a "Yupster" — i.e., Yuppy + Hipster — but "Yepster" sounds less lamestream.

And it's my wife who has all the Apple products. I only have an iPod, which I just got last Christmas.

Jamoosh is worried that my speed is taking flight: "Great. Now that you are fast, I can't visit you. Guess I'll go visit some sloths in Wisconsin instead."

Answer: Nonsense. I still need to take you to Akron's breweries. If you're that worried about it, I'll go barefoot and see how many rocks and tree roots I can kick.

Happy Hour arrives early today, teammates! Have a finely brewed weekend. Run well and drink well. Cheers!

Don't Bet on Me

On Saturday, at a race that wasn't delayed for a possible bomb (but I hear the pasta was defused), there was a certain racer whose name resonated with certain readers like Ms. V.

Backtalk, obviously named for my weekly Flashback Friday section, had 50-1 odds of winning the Kentucky Derby. "I bet on him," Ms. V. said.

Poor choice.

Backtalk finished dead last. The thoroughbred's best finish was third, which is where I finished in the recently rigged Last Mile Brewing Popularity Contest Virtual Halfathon. We share a similar racing pedigree.

Boy, April didn't offer much to be proud of in terms of running. Here is last month's statistical rundown:

• Total Miles: 40 miles (10 runs)
• Highest Weekly: 21 miles
  
• Average Weekly: 9.3 miles
  
• Average Pace: 10:42.84 per mile
  
• Longest/Fastest Run: 6 miles, 10:09 pace
  
• The Monthly Dif: -17 miles (57 miles in March)

Fewer miles, slower miles. But the last week was much better than the middle weeks of the month when I fell into a funk.

Flashback Friday: Don't Ryan Hall Me

Right now, I'm neck and neck with Adam for third place in the Last Mile Brewing Virtual Halfathon. Don't let me suffer the fate of Ryan Hall at this year's Boston Marathon. Help me get on the podium with a wicked fast finishing kick. Sadly, you failed to help me catch up to Jess and MCM Mama, who are battling for the epic win. They can go straight to hell.

Don't worry, voting ends this weekend, so you won't have to hear about this anymore.

In other news, I have finally entered my first race of the year, the Tallmadge Memorial 5-K. One month to get into PR shape.

Back Talk
Wherein we open up team headquarters to your pressing questions

JoyRuN thinks she can wander in and out of my very important posts like a wino wanders in and out of sobriety: "I can't remember where you are with shoes, but is that the NB trail shoe? I was thinking of getting a pair for the longer distances -- would be cheaper than the Nike Frees."

Answer: That is indeed a New Balance trail shoe in Dobson's mouth -- the Enthusiast's New Balance trail shoe. (Sorry, don't know what model.) You can go to Joe's New Balance Outlet and definitely save some dollars. I rotate between my Brooks T6 Racers, my hippie shoes and bare feet these days. But you'd already know that if you read my blog more often.

Funnyrunner is happy that I've officially begun my quest to break four hours in my fall marathon, but she needs to pay closer attention (and learn how to use the "Shift" key): "cool. so what's the planned for fall marathon? (or did I miss that?)" [sic as hell]

Answer: There was a reason why that post had a link to this post. For the fourth year in a row, I'll be running my hometown marathon. You're just going to have click the links to figure that out. (And BTW, I never claimed to know why your ankles rock.)

Happy Hour is nearly upon us, teammates. Team BHI is headed to the nearest patio for a bit of drinking in the sun. Have a finely brewed weekend. Run well and drink well. Cheers!

The Hills Are Alive with the Sound of Mis'ry

I'd hate to jinx myself, but my ankles are awesome. I was tearing down the Memorial Parkway hill at an 8:15 clip, spinning my feet, when my left foot landed on a rock or in a hole or something that caused it to roll and me to almost French kiss the glass strewn curb.

For a moment, I must have looked like one of those collapsing toy figurines, as I stumbled and recovered -- ungracefully but effectively -- and continued onward. There was a twinge in my ankle, but everything seemed fine after a few tentative steps. There is no hint of a strain or sprain today.

My only theory for why my ankles are super rad is running barefoot or in minimalist shoes. My feet and supporting muscles and ligaments have gotten stronger and more resilient, and I've started to figure out how to react when I land on things that hurt.

My 4.5-mile hill interval was completed at 9:09 mile pace, an improvement of 2:23 over last week's total time.

They're Cheats
You are letting the cheaters get away with it if you don't go change your vote to "Viper." I'm the only person who competed in the Last Mile Brewing Virtual Halfathon who wrote a race report that takes as long to read as running a half marathon. The other contenders? Look how short those performances are! That can't be legal. Do the right thing: Vote for Viper.

Rest Days Are the Best Days

It almost seems silly to take a rest day after all the not running I've done lately, but it was chilly and windy and I chose not to run. Today's forecast is much more appealing. And it gives me some separation between that surprisingly fast run yesterday and that vicious hill I plan on running today.

Change Your Vote
Clearly, you made a mistake, but it's not too late to fix it. Jess and MCM Mama have erroneously gained the lead in the final stretches of the Last Mile Brewing Virtual Halfathon. But if you go to the voting page, you can correct this trend by changing your vote to me as you intended (that's Viper, folks, V-I-P-E-R). It's OK, I understand that these things sometimes happen.

Flashback Friday: Bringing Up Old Shit

It's been a slow week, and I don't just mean my pacing. HEY-OH!

Weather, demotivation and other interests have kept me from running this week. Yeah, there has been some beer, but nothing too notable (except Bell's Special Double Cream Stout). I have had nothing worthy enough to bother myself with wasting your time. But then something happened.

I received a comment.

I know, I get a brazilian comments, but this one was special, namely because it ripped on Nitmos. And I love when people rip on Nitmos.

However, this particular comment was posted to a blog from Oct. 8, 2008, as I was preparing for the Towpath Marathon and contemplating a negative split approach, after Vanilla had sent me this link to the WebZealot. The topic seemed kind of old. But what else is Flashback Friday for, if not to rehash something from last year?

It seems the WebZealot was doing some rehashing of his own yesterday and came across my ever insightful post, and he took exception to Nitmos's comment.

As a refresher, here's what Nitmos said:

"Have you practiced negative splits? It's a discipline more than a strategy in my opinion. As long as your body is trained to accelerate at maximum fatigue, more power to you!

Good luck. I think you'll succeed because you sound extra motivated (or extra drunk ... hard to decipher).

Either way, you're still a fool. That's what we all appreciate about you.

Go get that PR!

And now, WebZealot:

"Nitmos- So because the negative split is a discipline, it should be disregarded as something for the elite runner? Did training for your marathon not take discipline? Does your running in general not take discipline?

I certainly think it does. So why should you toe the line on race day and suddenly throw discipline out the window? Going negative doesn't take practice so much as it takes common sense and patience. It's not like your suddenly being asked at the 16 mile mark to start laying down five minute miles. All it's asking is that you use the first half of the race to set up the second half so that you can run at a pace (albeit a quick pace) that is within your ability level.

Look, I'm not trying to be hard on you or anyone else ... But I think the negative is a good approach for ANYONE regardless of ability. Sure, it is not without its downside ... You MAY finish feeling like you left too much on the road. But personally, I would rather finish that way than straggling across the line after walking the last four miles, feeling like I had just been run over by a truck.

Most folks who poo-poo negative splits have either never given them a real honest try, or can't come to grips with the notion that their target time is simply out of their ability range. There is no shame in that. On paper, negatives can seem daunting.

Kudos to Vanilla [Drunkard's note: This is how you know I didn't make this up] for being able to burn it up out of the gate the way he does and still hang on ... But I'd be willing to bet running negative would net him an even better time.

Viper, I'd be curious to know what you end up pulling off...

Let the bickering begin!

Of course, most of you know that I pulled off a double negative, which in mathematical and linguistic terms means, basically, FAIL.

My own take on the negative split argument is that WebZealot and Nitmos are both right idiots.

The strategy didn't work for me at the Towpath Marathon, but I learned a few things:

• Negative splitting is hard
• Though my second half was a positive split, I still PR-ed
• I felt better at the end than I did in my previous two marathons
• My four-hour goal may have been too ambitious, especially given that it was my second marathon in two weeks
• The negative split merits a second try
• But I need to practice the discipline throughout my training.
  

Back Talk
Wherein even though I just posted two tldr comments, I'm going to post another one because that's the kind of regurgitation you've come to expect every Friday.

After I mentioned I had ice in my beard when I finished my 1,000-mile journey, joyRuN, tfh, X-Country2, Ms. V and MCM Mama expressed concern about my facial growth. Thankfully, my shift-button challenged friend, the erratic epicurean, came to my rescue: "hear this blog readers, the viper looks very nice with a beard. it hides his ugly mug!" [sic]

Answer: See? What were you all worried about?

And Xenia asked if the picture from that post was the infamous Towpath.

Answer: Nope.

Happy Hour is nearly upon us. I hope you have a fine weekend brewing. Run well and drink well. Cheers!