We had one of those company meetings this morning that required doughnuts. Here, have a sugar fix while we tell you the bad news. There's no golden parachute for us, so make sure you save for retirement. Even then you might be living in a refrigerator box when you're 65. But those doughnuts might get you before then.
The devil dons a Dunkin Donuts disguise. Just ask Jess. She knows.
Here, I sit back at my desk, meeting over, doughnuts still lurking in the kitchen. Do not heed temptation, son. You already ate a hearty breakfast. You are not hungry. This coffee will not taste better with a glazed cruller. The pull-ups you did this morning don't make it OK to gorge yourself now. Just say no. Keep the devil locked away in his orange and pink box. The world can run without Dunkin, trust me.
Now, if they were from Spudnut ...
No, no, no. Not even a Spudnut doughnut shall be cause for munching on sugar-coated, deep-fried dough. Rebel against the Empire of Sugar!