The Curse of Convenience

The whole time the Little Debbie Swiss Cake Roll made its way to my mouth, my mind was screaming, "No, don't do it. Don't eat this." Nomnomnomnomnom.

What could I do? It was there. And, might I add, it was the second package I'd eaten today.

Ever since Baby Viper arrived on scene, our lair has been junked up with malnutricious convenience food. Fast food, pizza, take out, hot dogs, snacks, candy, microwaveable meals, etc., etc., etc., all are high in ... everything bad. We know we should be eating healthier, but it's so much easier to grab something on the way home or call for delivery. It's a curse, a vicious cycle of "What do you want for dinner? I don't know. Let's just ..."

And then we eat like crap.

Neither of us wants to cook. We have healthy options in the house, but we're too tired to plan ahead. We forget to take out frozen meat to defrost. We don't think about our meals until we're on the verge of acting out The Hunger Games.

How do you shatter the pattern?

Mrs. Viper and I want to eat better and lose some pregnancy-induced weight gain, but it's hard to find the energy to make better choices about our diet.

Resistance Isn't Futile

We had one of those company meetings this morning that required doughnuts. Here, have a sugar fix while we tell you the bad news. There's no golden parachute for us, so make sure you save for retirement. Even then you might be living in a refrigerator box when you're 65. But those doughnuts might get you before then.

The devil dons a Dunkin Donuts disguise. Just ask Jess. She knows.

Here, I sit back at my desk, meeting over, doughnuts still lurking in the kitchen. Do not heed temptation, son. You already ate a hearty breakfast. You are not hungry. This coffee will not taste better with a glazed cruller. The pull-ups you did this morning don't make it OK to gorge yourself now. Just say no. Keep the devil locked away in his orange and pink box. The world can run without Dunkin, trust me.

Now, if they were from Spudnut ...

No, no, no. Not even a Spudnut doughnut shall be cause for munching on sugar-coated, deep-fried dough. Rebel against the Empire of Sugar!

Manifesto for the Betterment and Reclamation of a Man Gone Astray

You witnessed last week's admission that healthiness has been a thing unheard of in recent months. So what do we do about that?

OK, so first of all stop eating like a Grade A: Glutton. My goodness, man, I've been a walking, talking black hole of empty calories these days. So, yeah, stop that.

The bottom line: My weight is too high, and my activity level is too low. While it's going to take some effort for this immovable object to get his ass in gear, strides can be made on the intake side of things.

Logging my food consumption was the first step in a process of cutting back and realigning my diet, a word that is not meant in today's usual parlance. "Diet" is an oft misused word, erroneously employed as a verb, implying an action that has a start and an end point.

If you want lasting results, then don't enact temporary solutions. A diet isn't something you do, but rather something you follow. And the one I've been following has led me far astray.

I'm addicted to sugar. Sweet, delicious, dopamine-inducing sugar. In addition to those Girl Scout cookies and Malley's marshmallow eggs, there have also been doughnuts, pie, other cookies, ice cream sundaes, corn bread, and oodles and oodles of jelly beans. That's just in the last two weeks.

My willpower is weak. Down the street at Dr. Bob's, they profess the mantra "one day at a time." If it can work for alcoholics, it can work for sweet addicts like me.

But sugar isn't the only problem. There's also the whole issue of eschewing real food in favor of eating what's fast and easy (and more expensive too). Do you know how much sodium is in that stuff?

I've always believed in simplicity. Eat less, move more. What else do you need to know about calories? In the process of limiting sugar and salt, the quality of my diet should also improve by removing empty calories and preservatives.

Tracking my diet is just the first step. Next it's cutting back on calories. Then we start moving more.

Flashback Friday: Expelling Excess

My injured left big toe had miraculously healed on Wednesday while I was at work. When Dobson wanted to go for a walk that night, I didn't want to reaggravate it somehow.

Wearing flipflops hurt that morning, so I put on my old stability shoes that I used to wear running but have since let sit useless in a row of other idled running shoes. I thought my old, broken-in trainers would be more comfortable than the shoes I'd worn to work. I was wrong.

Shocked by the mass of these clodhoppers and surprised by how awkward my toe felt inside these protective casings, I removed the old shoes in favor of the flatsoled brown leather Sperrys I'd worn all day.

I've held onto my old cushioned running shoes because it seemed so wasteful to get rid of them. Besides, I could wear them to bum around, or maybe I'd don them again during the snowy months like I did last winter.

Three out of the four pairs of shoes I have left over from my non-minimalist days -- or I should say, my excessive days -- have more than 500 miles on them and the other pair is close behind. However, we all know that 500-mile mark is just a marketing myth to get you to buy another pair of $100 shoes.

Maybe it's time to expel these unused extras. I was thinking I should donate them to one of those running charities. If any of you have any ideas of where I can dispose of these shoes, please let me know.

Back Talk

Wherein we discuss starvation strategies.

Several of you echoed Xenia's concern about my long runs without fuel: "Are you going without fuel because you don't want to carry anything with you or because you like to torture yourself?"

Answer: First, I was too lazy to go buy electrolyte gels or whathaveyou for my long runs. Then, I was too cheap. Then, I realized that this might actually be a good training strategy. I eat before I run and then rely on my body's energy stores to get me through to the end. So far, I'm still alive.

Happy Hour is nearly upon us, teammates. Have a finely brewed weekend. Run well and drink well. Cheers!

Flashback Friday: What Goes In

I first started to truly think about food's effect on performance after reading a 2005 interview with Sally Jenkins, a Washington Post sports columnist and coauthor of Lance Armstrong's book, It's Not About the Bike.

In the Poynter Institute interview, Jenkins compared athletes performing under pressure to journalists writing under deadline and how the brain functions in high-stress situations. She argued that the brain robs the body of energy in order to think. Therefore, the better shape we're in, the better we'll react to pressure.

A big part of that equation is what we eat.

"Any athlete will tell you that what goes into your body is what comes out, in the performance," Jenkins said.

The interview inspired me to pursue a healthier lifestyle so that I could better deal with the deadlines of my then-new job. Consequently, I started running the next March. (Seriously, read the interview.)

It didn't take me long to latch onto the concept of food as fuel. Running lets you know pretty quickly if what you ate beforehand was a good choice or not.

For instance, beef jerky and Mountain Dew will not take you very far. A better choice would include a mix of complex carbohydrates, sodium and potassium -- like, say, a Fiber One bar and a piece of fruit. And for goodness sake, drink water, not soda pop.

"A marathoner doesn't drink a Coke and eat a glazed doughnut before a race, because he'll collapse," Jenkins said.

Ryan Hall recently wrote about staying hydrated at his blog, suggesting that a glass of water first thing in the morning will give you a jumpstart on your daily hydration needs. He also drinks eight ounces of water before and after a meal to help with digestion. That's a smart way to get your water and help avoid the grumble gut on your run.

I'm pretty good about drinking water throughout the work day, as I have a 32-ounce bottle at my desk. I tend to drink two full bottles before I go home, but then I kind of forget about hydration.

I need to get better about drinking water at home and on the weekends. Eating smarter before a run will always be a battle, which is why I prefer to run before I eat.

Back Talk
Wherein we exchange our water for something a little more appropriate.

The multi-blogged TinaGirl was worried that the Sierra Nevada Summerfest had sullied my enjoyment of this brewery's, uh ... er, brews: "Sierra Nevada is in my very own backyard (well at least on the other end of town) and for a small brewing company they have many different options, so you may not have enjoyed Summerfest enough but there are lots more 'heavy Hitters' to choose from!"

Answer: Never fear. Sierra Nevada has been on my A list for years. I'm always willing to try one of their new creations. The Porter and Stout are still my favorite. The Summerfest was exactly as advertised -- very refreshing. In fact, I had one last night after another bout with Memorial Hill.

On that note, Happy Hour is nearly upon us, teammates. Have a finely brewed weekend. Run well and drink well. Cheers!