The track was virtually empty for my first few intervals. So far, so good. Perhaps my legs weren't as tired as I thought. I was feeling all Olympicky with my dead nuts-on pacing. But then somebody's weirdo, red-headed step-child showed up.
I was drinking some water when this pink-skinned, shirtless wonder arrived. He had run from who knows where. This wrong-headed soul trotted onto the track, going the wrong way, gave me the googly eye and turned around to run counterclockwise.
I was ready for my next 800 meters. I stepped back onto the track, pressed the lap button on my watch and picked up my pace. After I rounded the first curve, I started gaining on the red rocket. I was in his hip pocket 50 meters later. And then he blasted off! Go man, go!
And then I caught up to him again at the second curve. Whoosh! There he went again, turning back his head slightly. Was this creep racing me? He played this fun little game almost throughout the interval. After 600 meters, I was content to stay within my pace. But alas, the game went on as I picked up my speed for the final kick. And again, he Bolted away.
I let him put some serious distance between us during my recovery lap. I didn't like the cut of his hair. I was glad when he bailed a couple repeats later. Obviously, he couldn't hang.
Now, the numbers ...
10x800 meters (goal pace 3:38.3 - 3:48.5)
If I plug those numbers into the McMillan Calculator, it says I should be able to run a 1:44:47 at the Buckeye Half Marathon. But then again, McMillan's site also says Yasso is full of shit and that my marathon would be more like 3:46:00, which puts me at a 1:47:10 half marathon. But then again, again, Nitmos says McMillan is an antiquated fool, but his new math is too complicated to figure out what my half marathon will be on Sep. 7. But then again, again, again, I still think Nitmos is an idiot.
So what's all this mean? I don't have time to explain it to you. I have work to do. Go away now. Run well and drink well.
[Drunkard's note: No offense intended toward any actual red-headed step-children.]