Thursday, January 13, 2011

A Different Kind of Taper

A few Christmases back, I got a full-on jogging suit made by Target's C9 by Champion. The pants and jacket are a windbreaker material, but are at least a size too big for me. The pants feel like bellbottoms. The jacket works well as a springtime jacket, but not for running.

However, when it comes this time of year in Ohio, I need a second lower layer, and these wind pants are my only option other than sweatpants. And come on, sweatpants? That's so passe. Nobody would believe I'm a runner in those.

So it is the giant wind pants I am forced to wear. I have to hike them up over my bellybutton like your stereotypical grandpa and double over the waistband to keep the bottom of the legs from dragging on the ground.

I think I'd really like a pair of tapered wind pants some day, but in the mean time I made my own. Back in the 1980s we used French cuff our pants and wear scrunchy socks with penny loafers. For you kids, the French cuff  was where you fold over the pant leg before rolling it up to create a taper. I have now adapted this concept to running gear.

I knew an actual French cuff would not hold with nylon material and the jostling of the running motion. Instead of rolling the leg up after the fold over move, I grabbed two safety pins left over from a racing bib and secured the taper. My wind pants have a zippered side, which allows me to leave the safety pin in place.

The modification to my wind pants held up well during yesterday morning's run. I can now hold off on buying a new pair until I see an irresistible sale.

12 comments:

Jamoosh said...

It's good to read you are doing everything within your power to get out there...Grandpa.

TNTcoach Ken said...

Yeah, that sounds way better than sweatpants! LOL

Xenia said...

At least with sweatpants, people would think you were trying to emulate Rocky. That's still cool, right?

*crickets*

Balls.

Morgan said...

Ghetto fabulous!

Jess said...

No explanation needed here for the "French cuff" -- I had that move DOWN!

I remember that phase well because my parents openly mocked my fashion choice by imitating my jeans rolling, and at the time, I always thought, "Man THEY look stupid because they're old. Me? I totally rock this look!"

Nitmos said...

Um, why don't you just find your wallet and go buy a pair that fits right? Crazy, I know.

Sun Runner said...

I'm surprised you're old enough to remember French cuffs. I, on the other hand, fondly remember French cuffing my acid wash foldover-waist jeans. Ah, those were the days...

I think about it now and my first thought is, why the fuck were they called "French" cuffs? To make them more Continental/European, and therefore, cooler?

And, Nitmos, we're talking about Viper here. Him, spend money he doesn't have to? What on earth are you thinking?!

Ironman By Thirty said...

Nitmos has a point. Keep this up and they are going to put your picture next to the definition of cheap.

Or is it that you are too embarrassed to pull out your 80's Velcro wallet from back when you French cuffed your jeans.

MCM Mama said...

French cuffed windpants, huh? LMAO. Like Jess, I totally had that move down with my jeans.

I'm just trying to figure out why you bought the outfit in the first place...

The Sean said...

Were you out of duct tape?

Robin said...

It's so pathetic, but I'm actually following along with your description like I'm watching an ABC after-school special on who not to run into while running after school! Great ingenuity, though!

Al's CL Reviews said...

I was thinking like Nitmos. Then I waited for the duct tape. But I guess you can't reuse duct tape.
Glad you had some safety pins you were able to reuse.