Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Race Forecast: Typical

Northeast Ohio is fond of overcast and miserable. That's why I wasn't surprised when I checked the weather forecast for Cleveland this Sunday and saw high 50s and rain showers. However, that might not be too bad as long as the rain isn't torrential. (Jinx!)

My training is all done. The goals for the remainder of the week are to stay loose with low mileage while avoiding injury. Last night featured a few intervals and tomorrow will be a short tempo run. With my mind off training, I've turned my focus toward my raceday plans.

The Viper now brings you The 24 Hours of the Cleveland Half Marathon in all its bullety goodness!
  • 8:50 a.m., Saturday -- The Viper finally rolls out of bed after lying there awake for hours since he was completely sober Friday night and got to bed at a reasonable time, but still it's Saturday and he doesn't feel like being awake this early. Speaking of which, sets alarm for 4 a.m.
  • 8:52 a.m. -- Boos (no, not booze) being awake this early.
  • 9:15 a.m. -- Puts on pants.
  • 9:16 a.m. -- Starts coffee, puts on shoes, walks down to corner store for newspaper.
  • 9:32 a.m. -- Returns home, pours coffee, sits on couch and reads newspaper.
  • 10:20 a.m. -- Recognizes agitation in stomach as hunger, rummages through cabinets for carbolicious sustenance.
  • 12 p.m. -- Finishes newspaper, considers lunch, really feels like going to local pub for a sandwich and a pint, chooses carboriffic carryout options instead.
  • 12:50 p.m. -- Decides it's time to annoy neighbors with banjo practice.
  • 2:53 p.m. -- Tires of annoying self with banjo practice, decides to go for easy 2-mile run.
  • 3:27 p.m. -- Returns from run, stretches like a good monkey, showers.
  • 4 p.m. -- Wishes this day was over already, virtually. Skips ahead, lets readers assume pasta dinner, teetotaling and reasonable bed time and then writes it anyway.
  • 12 a.m., Sunday -- Welcome to race day.
  • 3:37 a.m. -- Wakes up in panic, checks time, goes back to sleep.
  • 4 a.m. -- Alarm goes off, hits snooze.
  • 4:09 a.m. -- Alarm goes off, hits snooze.
  • 4:18 a.m. -- Alarm goes off, hits snooze.
  • 4:27 a.m. -- Alarm goes off, hits snooze, hears neighbor complain.
  • 4:36 a.m. -- Alarm goes off, hits snooze, makes coffee, sits on couch and stares into middle distance.
  • 4:45 a.m. -- Alarm goes off, hits snooze, drinks coffee, showers.
  • 4:57 a.m. -- Exits shower, dries off, hears alarm going off, turns off alarm.
  • 5 a.m. -- Eats breakfast.
  • 5:08 a.m. -- Gets dressed.
  • 5:15 a.m. -- Warms up.
  • 5:30 a.m. -- Departs for Cleveland.
  • 5:53 a.m. -- Remembers that second (work) alarm for 6:45 a.m. was not turned off, smirks.
  • 6:30 a.m. -- Arrives in Cleveland, parks at designated lot (which will remain undisclosed so that none of you sneaky jerks swoops in and steals my spot), gets in mobile pisspot line, generally mills around, seeks out honorary Booze Hound A.H. to wish him good luck on his BQ attempt and enters starting corral.
  • 7 a.m. -- And we're off!
  • 8:50 a.m. -- Finish!
You can be sure that all activities after crossing the finish will be related to the pursuit and consumption of proper rehydrating fluids. In the next post, I will explore post-race refreshment and recovery. And I don't mean "recovery" in the A.A. sense.


C said...

Sucks to be you. I'm much luckier. The forecast for my 10K on the 18th is for partly cloudy skies and high 50s. Now, having rubbed your face in it, the karma gods are going to totally screw me. And not in a good way.

Good luck on Sunday!

Ian said...

I'm jealous of your alarm clock. Mine has 2 separate alarms too, but the snooze function on mine is only 6 minutes. WTF is that about? I long for a 9 minute snooze button.

B. Kramer said...

Xenia, you'll get yours.

Vanilla, actually I can set my snooze to however long I please. Best damn alarm clock I've ever owned.

Unknown said...

Speaking of weather in Cleveland, that's sound pretty typical. As they say, "Cleveland is a big mistake by the lake." I know there is bad rap about Cleveland. After the race, you can always head to the Flats for a big post-recovery bash.

B. Kramer said...

You obviously have not been to the Flats in a while. But thank you for the good luck wishes.

The Laminator said...

Because I live by the adage if you snooze, don't win, so if I snooze before a race, I always have to do it an even number of times, because a double negative is always a positive...still have yet to beat a Kenyan though so use at your own discretion.

Good luck in your race.

Sun Runner said...

Northeast Ohio is fond of overcast and miserable.

That it is, that it is. Spoken like a true North Coaster. Best of luck in the big race and I can't wait to hear your race report. If I wasn't doing my half in Virginia I would totally be doing the Cleveland half.

And the Flats?! Ha ha ha ha ha...*wipes tear*. Oh, many was the boozy night I had down there back in the mid-1990s on summer breaks from college! Then there was the time I snuck my best friend into the Playdium (or was that Palladium?) by letting her use my ID because I was 18 and she wasn't yet...oh, those were the days! I heard the district fell on hard times and most if not all of the places are closed...anyone else remember the Basement?

Never fear...the Flats will rise again!

Good luck on the race!

Laura said...

8:52 am is only a good time of day if you are boozing. Remember that for next time.

My alarm clock is automatically set to a 9 minute cycle. It cannot be changed. I have never understood why! 9 minutes is just so... random.

The Salty One said...

And that jerk Jack Staph should do something about the damn weather too.

Thanks for the blog visit. Good luck on Sunday! I'll be somewhere out there cheering.

chia said...

*Insert fast happy free beer thoughts here*