Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Belly Stretching

Tomorrow is my favorite holiday. Gather ye loved ones and liquor. Nothing feels quite as merry as Thanksgiving. Friends in from out of town. Family gathered to feast. The kitchen aromas tantalizing your nose. Beverages in hand. Football teams I don't care about playing games that actually appear competitive in comparison to the Cleveland Browns. It is a perfect day. Perfect, except for the snow in the forecast, that is.

You must have a powerful hunger and a mighty thirst if you intend on making this holiday a success. Your belly must be well stretched, yet you must burn off the calories you take in during the stretching process to ensure a proper appetite.

Today, eat a hearty lunch and dinner, and go for a moderately long run. Then, tomorrow morning, eat a small breakfast (try oatmeal) and go for a short run. If you do nothing after your run until the time the bird is served, you'll be ravenous. That's where your trusted beverologist comes into play. The perfect aperitif will stave off the hunger pangs without taking up valuable bowel space, allowing you to perform up to your consumptive abilities come feeding time.

I find that a crisp white wine does wonders while I'm waiting for the dinner bell. You may find that a light cocktail or a bold beer does the trick for you. Regardless of your flavor, enjoy your holiday. Except for you foreigners, no turkey for you.

4 comments:

Jess said...

I love Turkey Day too! All the glories of gluttony without the guilt and stress of gift giving.

Enjoy your Thanksgiving!

The Sean said...

the New Belgium 2 below in already on ice... enjoy the festivities and may the wish bone break in your favor!

Razz said...

couldn't have said it better myself. Well, I tried, but.....

Have a good one! Cheers!

Spike said...

I try the opposite approach, I overeat for days leading up to the big t-day...a reverse taper if you will.