Absinthe Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

It made Pablo Picasso paint noses in places where noses don't go. Edgar Allen Poe could never say never more to having one more. One tipple of it made Toulouse Lautrec feel six feet tall when he was four-and-a-half feet small.

The United States banned absinthe in 1912, but now all's well. And apparently all has been well since March 2007, unbeknownst to this researcher. Shows what little I know.

To make up for my gaffe and because 'tis the season, I'd like to present you with this gift, a new recipe. Well, not a recipe per se, but a new drinking ritual.

The Nightmare Before Christmas

Ingredients:

• Patron Silver
• Goldschlager
• Pomegranate liqueur
• Absinthe (Originally, this recipe had creme de menthe for the green coloring.)
• Great Lakes Christmas Ale (If your local supplier does not carry Great Lakes, substitute a Christmas brew of your liking.)

Procedure:
Upon concocting this recipe I realized -- or rather I was told -- that mixing these ingredients would result in a poop brown color, which I thought was perfect. However, upon further distillation of the idea I have decided that these should be drunk (as you should be) in order.

First, because this is also a running blog, you'll want to ensure that your day's run is completed before embarking on the Nightmare Before Christmas. Either that or make it a rest day.

Second, because I don't want to offend anyone, you should know that I respect whatever holiday you celebrate. Your secular or non-secular choices are your own. I don't want a jihad on my site. But today, you're celebrating Christmas. The Nightmare Before Kwanzaa just sounds stupid. And there's no movie to reference there.

Now, let's drink.

Line up one shot each of the spirits and one pint (or 12-ounce bottle) of Christmas Ale. Before you get started, get your hi-fi synced to play the following Christmas tunes in order: "Do You Hear What I Hear," "Deck the Halls," "Holly Jolly Christmas," and "Silent Night."

When you hear in "Do You Hear What I Hear" the line "let us bring him silver and gold," then let your hand bring you Patron Silver and Goldschlager. The line is repeated in case you're slow of throat.

When you hear "deck the halls with boughs of holly," deck your gullet with the red and green of pomegranate liqueur and absinthe.

When you are told to "have a holly jolly Christmas," have a holly jolly Christmas Ale. And I mean you'd better kill it. After all, it is a cup of cheer.

When "Silent Night" whispers in your ear, the shores of Blackout Island will be near.

If that doesn't get you in the holiday spirit, then you're fucked.

[Drunkard's note: Thanks to Gin for the Absinthe information. It is no surprise to get year-old "news" from this lass.]

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Mile Tracker 1,000: 84 miles to go.