Friday, October 17, 2008

Flashback Friday: On Holiday By Mistake

The Viper is not here. He is on vacation (hint) and will return Tuesday. But you are so in luck. Amy and Tom of Runners' Lounge fame have come through for you. Go check out Open Mic Friday at the Runners' Lounge blog for an exclusive interview with your favorite blogger. (Only the second interview the Viper has given to date.)

The Viper, meanwhile, in his magnanimous benevolence, has compiled the rest of this post in advance for your amusement. Be sure to thank him for his kindness, as you pine for his return.


Back Talk

Wherein I think of those witty comebacks too late.

Xenia has a question for me: "Do you have a Jekyll and Hyde personality or something? You sound so positive and helpful to others when you run a marathon but not so much when you're not. Interesting. And by interesting, I mean wtf."

Answer: I was born under a bad sign.

Adolpho sends me this bit of spam advice to consider after the Towpath Marathon: "Boozehound is a physical tonic that when equipped causes drinking alcohol to restore a small amount of EVE, rather than draining it. Drinking too much too quickly will cause your vision to blur for a short time."

Answer: Maybe you should avoid commenting while drunk, adolpho.

[Drunkard's note: If any of you are willing to go on a Team BHI mission, feel free to click on adolpho's links in Monday's comments. I won't do it.]

Laura is apparently on a recruitment drive, as she offers her idea on what I should do with my running for the rest of the year: "I'm with Nitmos ... do another marathon and join the Maniacs!"

Answer: I don't trust people who are with Nitmos. And as Karl Marx said, "I don't want to belong to any club that will accept me as a member." That's also why I'm no longer a Commie.

Ms. V begs and pleas for my sympathy (but I don't mind): "Hey, how about rooting for the Dodgers so I don't have to wait ANOTHER 20 years."

Answer: Are you kidding me? I've waited 29 years for Cleveland to win the World Series. The city itself has been waiting for like mathisnotmystrongsuit since 1948! And that's just for a baseball championship. Go Phillies! (I'm also rooting for a No Sox Series! Go Rays, you devils!)

And finally Sarah thinks she's hot shit because she's got less stubble than me: "I need to shave my 5K stubble time. Mine's 23:19. What's yours? OOOOHHHHH ... Burn, baby burn!"

Answer: Remember, it's not how much you start with, but how much you shave off. And you have to shave from a PR, whereas I don't. Marinate in that for a minute.

Good luck to Sarah and Nitmos at the Detroit Marathon. Good luck to Chia at the Grand Rapids (Mich.) Marathon. And if I forgot to wish you luck on your race, it's because you have not paid you team dues. But good luck anyway. Run well and drink well this weekend, teammates. Cheers!

Also, congrats to Ted, who may or may not have posted his 100th post recently.

7 comments:

Sarah said...

My 5K stubble time isn't even my 5K PR. That's 22:45 (from a race in June, outside the boundaries of the stubble time submission period). But FINE. You're right, I have to best that 23:19 AGAIN. Oh well, once this marathon shit is over with I can concentrate on my speed again.

And btw I think you should have said "ferment on that" because this is, after all, the Booze Hounds blog, not the Red Meat Eaters blog. Though I am of both persuasions. ;)

And FINALLY, aw, you remembered I'm running a marathon this weekend! How sweet. I knew you had a warm and fuzzy side somewhere.

Have fun on vacation wherever it is.

Ms. V. said...

**blink**

You're back?

I hate the Phillies.

Marcy said...

Gemini is an awesome sign. Bipolar, fo sho!

Now go and enjoy your vacation already ;-)

Glaven Q. Heisenberg said...

To paraphrase Tom Waits, "Reality is for those who are too weak to face excessive drinking."

You said in a comment on my blog that you would blog from beyond the grave. And now you have. You are a Viper of your word. If you decide to Blog From The Beyond Again, I have a question for you:

I'm 6'4" tall, but I've always wanted to know: Is Jebus taller than me? I know he's faster. Word around these parts is Jebus is so full of himself, he thinks he's Nitmos.

Xenia said...

I thought my Google Reader had hiccuped when I saw this post. Sadly, I was mistaken.

Gemini is not a bad sign. My sister is a gemini. You, my drunk friend, are the one who give it a bad name.

Hope you're enjoying your holiday. When you get back, maybe you can correct your misspelling of 'foreign' in the post tag.

chia said...

Hopefully you're off sinning profusely in only the happiest fermentedly induced way ;-)!!

BTW - You already qualified for the Maniacs by doing 2 marathons in 3 weeks.

Sarah said...

P.S. Duh, Cooperstown. Now I know you didn't got there just for beer (though it looks like mighty fine beer). My first time there I felt like I was having a religious experience.